Consciousness and Healing

Coming to understand the interconnection between healing and consciousness takes some time…and some consciousness, too.

All that we knew to be true no longer holds. Our old ways of being, thinking and operating are no longer productive, nor desirable. We come to realize that our pain; be it physical, emotional, or psychological, is simply a manifestation of our disconnection from our essence, our essential nature, and our Source.

The path of healing requires surrendering, not just once, but an infinite number of times. It requires our humble submission to a life unlike the one we “thought” we were supposed to have, yet one that feels oddly familiar and rich, too.

In 2007, when I first began writing and producing books to promote health “from the inside-out”, I was not entirely sure why I felt so called to do this, only that I had to.  The word “consciousness” was not even in my vocabulary at the time….nor soulwork…nor biofield…nor grace.

All healing journeys, whether someone is dealing with cancer, endometriosis, cystic fibrosis, mental illness, or divorce, have a common “treatment” and that is the elevation of the person’s consciousness.  Without this, treatment is incomplete.

Very few medical doctors today can help you with this. It is something we have to learn to do for ourselves, breath by breath.

When you’re fully ready to receive the experience your soul is guiding, there is a calm and clarity that pervades your entire life.  Follow this. Embrace this. Accept the invitation and trust that all will be well, not in the ways you “think”, but in the ways that are sustainable and real.

From authentic to wise: evolving our expectations of leaders

We live in such an incredible and exciting time in human history. It is also a chaotic and creative time, this, in large part, due to our growing awareness of the inter-connectedness of life and its systems, both at the individual and global level.

Increasingly so, our world is in need of leaders who get this and who see the bigger picture; who realize both the opportunity and the danger inherent in our collective and expanding consciousness, not to advance their own selfish interests, but to alleviate human suffering and to assist in creating prosperity for all who seek it.

When I look back at my own leadership training and education, I see the toxic, patriarchal energy and the legacy of this mentality in our world.  I also see how, unless challenged, systems are self-perpetuating. Those who benefit from a “system” be it social or economic, have little incentive to make their system obsolete. Accordingly, change can only be birthed and patiently cultivated and ushered by those who see the need for it.

Today, I see the beautiful and gentle rising of the long-silenced voices, including my own, as we awaken to join or to lead conversations about justice, equality, prosperity, and peace. These are the souls who are working individually and collectively to help heal our world, and to co-create new systems of human well-being, productivity, and prosperity.

We are, each one of us, partially responsible for the co-creation of our communities, our country, and world.  Because we are now more aware, we can see with greater clarity, the options before us. What kind of world are you willing to co-create?

Many of us who have been trained in authentic leadership have come to realize its limitations. To be authentic, meant to know myself well enough so that I may bring my best-self forward in each encounter.  It was limited to me and my personality, my values, and strengths.

While the notion of authentic leadership served us well, my sense is that it also needs to evolve. Knowing ourselves is only the first step. We must also understand the bigger picture, which continues to unfold before us at an exponential pace.

We desperately need leaders who can not only “connect the dots, and the bigger dots, and old dots in new ways”, but ones who can stay in the tension, with courage and confidence, and make decisions and take action based not on the stale resources of their own mind, nor from dogma, but from the consciousness of non-local intelligence or unified field…and then invite others to do the same.

Becoming a wise leader is not something just for individuals in formal leadership roles, but those already working in management and leadership capacities have a greater responsibility.  More and more, due to the public’s awareness of cycles of power and abuse, of poor leadership, of uncovering perpetrators of sexual harassment, racism, and sexism among other “isms”, business-as-usual can no longer stand. More than ever in human history, we need wise leaders in public service, education, business, and in healthcare.

What makes a leader wise? Here are some suggested areas for study and growth for us all.

 

 

 

 

How conscious do you want to be?

“There is no coming to consciousness without pain.” – Carl Jung

Coming to consciousness, which is our ability to see without distortion, requires that we temporarily turn our attention away from a few trusted anchors, namely, our own thoughts and emotions.

While coming to know and understand the nature of our minds demands our full attention and awareness, if we don’t move past it, we remain stuck in our own thoughts, or worse, come to believe them as truth.

Same goes for feelings and emotions. We can become so certain that because we “feel” something, we must act upon it.  Yet, without understanding the wisdom behind the emotion, we lack clarity– which inevitably leads us back to “enlightened wisdom” because of the pain and or suffering we cause ourselves through sheer ignorance.

Everything we do and don’t do serves the greater good. If we embrace the notion that everything that is happening is actually enlightened wisdom, and can hold this paradox in our hearts, our desire to judge ourselves or anyone, simply melts away.

So, is there a “right way” to expand our consciousness. No. All ways are the way. Even as I crafted this graphic, I realized the futility of creating something semi-linear and “staged”…..however, as our minds do like to try to make sense of these things, I’ve outlined what I see as the evolutionary path of consciousness (our ability to see the world without distortion), and the various stops along the way.

As always, this work of mine has a simple goal; to help reduce human suffering by facilitating human flourishing. If we don’t know where to look, we can’t see it, and therefore, we can’t create the conditions that promote health, well-being, creativity, and true-productivity.

 

The People Who Grind Us and the People Who Shine Us

I’ve been contemplating this for a little while– specifically, the people who have, whether intentionally or unintentionally “grinded” me; meaning that they caused me to reassess, re-think, and re-evaluate, whether personally or professionally, some aspect of my life.

The “grinders” are not easy people. They’re not supposed to be. Their sole (soul) purpose is to show you where you have work to do because you have not fully integrated your own trueness. That’s it.

Getting into any kind of ego battle with a grinder is not only ridiculous, it is wasteful of your energy and creativity.   “Grinders” are learning too by the way,  and you, in fact, are a “grinder” to them/for them! (in Buddhist teachings, the “grinder” is only yourself– there is no “other”).

Ultimately, the “grinders” are a gift because they represent the fullest vision and version of something you yourself find intolerable, and in doing so, provide an incredible opportunity to  consciously change.

And the “shiners”?……they are represented in everyone and everything, actually. Anyone who makes you shine, lights you up, awakens some aspect of yourself, is a shiner– and that includes the grinders……especially the grinders! 

Practice Seeing the Good


This suggestion, to practice seeing the good, is a simple, powerful, and life-changing one.

While at first, this may feel fake, stupid, or even disingenuous, there are solid and scientifically-backed reasons why implementing such a practice will improve your life, work, and health.

Intentionally changing our neurocircuitry and neurochemistry requires attention, followed by action. With every thought, emotion, and action we create, or don’t, we are literally creating “code” in our body. Consequently, this creates a vibrational sequence (we now know that everything in the universe is energy) that either promotes or hinders our health and well-being, and that of those closest to us (see the work by Fowler & Christakis on connection and the power of networks).

When we practice seeing the good, we are affirming life as it truly is. When we affirm and accept, we create less resistance– in fact, we are yielding to what is…and when we yield to what is, we are free (yes, free!) to chose, move, create from a place of clarity and conviction, not one of fear and anger.

When we begin to see through the lens of gratitude, arguments become obsolete (you are only arguing with yourself, anyway); competition becomes a repugnant option; and you see, quite clearly, that supporting and enhancing your own trueness is what makes true progress occur; not destroying the other, but consciously creating the new you.

It seems paradoxical that something as gentle as gratitude, could be so powerful.  Like any other contemplative practice, it has the potential to transform the way we live and work…but only if we practice it.

Asking Better Questions

Being bilingual has informed me in ways I’m still discovering.

Having a vast range of words to describe the color of the ocean, for example, has shaped the way I see the ocean, and life.

Ultimately, we are, each of us, an expression of what we think we are and what we are capable of in this world. The quality of our lives, which is shaped by the words we use and the thoughts we entertain, time and time again, do steer our course.

But, what happens when we question this? When we challenge even our own long-standing language and notions, when we, like Rilke invites us to practice “living in the questions.

Learning a new language, albeit French, Mandarin, or love and appreciation, will change you through sheer expansion of awareness. To me, that is the most incredible and fun part of being a human being; that just by getting a little “software upgrade”, we are immediately improved.

Unmasking the “isms”

PHOTO CREDIT: NASA.GOV

On this momentous day (solar eclipse 2017), as I join so many others around our country and the world doing the deeper work required for mutual understanding and personal peace, I wanted to tend to the obvious; the “isms”.

The isms are co-constructed ideas. These “beliefs”, which continue to plague us and cause such suffering have landed squarely on our collective laps.

Clearly, it is up to each of us to “re-construct” new ways of thinking and being. Our health and the health of our world is at stake. That is how important this is.

We cannot, nor will we ever achieve understanding and peace through the use of force or fear. Sadly, we have a long and painful history of doing just this. Are you going to do more of the same? Or, are you willing to try something new to help reduce your own suffering and aggression?

As with all beliefs, these “isms” can be abandoned or changed at any time. Which are you ready to re-think and re-construct?

Consumerism– belief that the purchase and/or consumption of a product can reduce your innate sense of inadequacy.

Patriotism/nationalism – belief that your country is the best in the world and/or the only one that matters.

Ageism– belief that people outside your age group are somehow incompetent and/or unproductive.

Sexism– belief that individuals, who don’t have the same gender as you, are not as competent, and those who have multiple genders, somehow flawed, pathological, or confused.

Racism– belief that individuals from a race different than yours, are less human than you.

Terrorism (interpersonal, domestic, national and global) – belief that the annihilation, control, or destruction of anyone/anything that espouses views different than yours, is the only way to ensure peace, progress, and the good of all.

Unmasking your own “isms”:

  1. OBSERVE: Become aware of the ways you either contribute to or are triggered by the beliefs and behaviors of others;
  2. SELF-CARE: If/when triggered, separate yourself (by yourself, for yourself) to explore your own beliefs and do not seize this exploration until you understand your “why”;
  3. INTEGRATION: We do not help anyone or anything by “destroying” it/them, but by changing the dynamic, which requires a change in OUR beliefs and behaviors (not “theirs”).
  4. PRACTICE: Allow all that you “resist” to teach you about the fullness of humanity in order to practice personal peace.

This is deep and ongoing work—all of this. It is soul-work, and it is everyone’s “work”.

Civility Begins at Home

Civility is a democratic and human value; one of basic respect for fellow human beings.

Violence is a symptom of a lack of civility; it is the visible evidence of a fearful and diminished mind; one that is incapable (or unaware) that to be human, requires co-existence.  In other words, that one live and let live— without threat– without insult  — without abuse.

“Violence is what happens when we don’t know what else to do with our suffering.” – Parker J. Palmer

Sadly many, (too many) people in our communities live in violent conditions. Unless they/we know what to do with this suffering, it can lead to two common responses:

1. paralysis

2. more violence 

How do we respond to fear and anger, and towards those who shout insults, demean, abuse, marginalize, threaten, kill?  Until someone comes up with a better plan, I’m going to defer to the truth which has been told to us by sages and spiritual leaders,  as well as by our contemporary peacemakers.

“We urgently need to bring to our communities the limitless capacity to love, serve, and create for and with each other. We urgently need to bring the neighbor back into our hoods, not only in our inner cities but also in our suburbs, our gated communities, on Main Street and Wall Street, and on Ivy League campuses.” – Grace Lee Boggs

For anyone who believes “love is weak” or that to love those who hate is an exercise in futility, I would like to offer that the “love” is for those who can accept and receive it– those who have already gone through several cycles of violence and paralysis, and who know, deeply and intimately, that the first person who needs this “love”, is actually themselves.  That is the game changer– the thing that neutralizes fear and enables a sliver of imagination to spring forth.

Civility, as with all other health behaviors, begins with the self. It starts with you. Only then, is it freely and effortlessly expressed outwardly and infinitely.

Ready-to-use educational resources:

CIVILITY ACTIVITY SHEET
WORKBOOK of HUMAN SUPERPOWERS (workbook)
WORKBOOK of HUMAN SUPERPOWERS (printable pack)

Adapting

Adaptation is a bit of a paradox.

While it is wise to adapt, it also feels like we’re surrendering, or somehow “giving up”.

Yes. It is both, and.

It is only in surrendering (our ego) that we allow the grace of life to enter our being.  To surrender to life, however, is no easy task.

In our Workbook of Human Superpowers we define adaptability this way: openness to changing conditions

Adaptability, then, is not necessarily something we do, but is more of an orientation, and openness, to whatever comes our way. If we desire happiness and personal peace, it is our task to adapt; constantly.

Control is the opposite, of course. However, control is something we all must do and try– until we learn, for ourselves, the futility of our effort.

Life is a constant flow of favorable and unfavorable events and circumstances. If we can be mindful (aware) of this, it becomes easier (slightly) to “go with the flow” and to adapt to what life is asking of us.

The Negativity Bias

This is a real thing. Simply put, the negativity bias is a conditioned response from your brain.

We all have a negativity bias, by the way. It is our “shark music” (Kristie’s term), and that part of us that exists to alert us of real, or perceived danger. It represents one input (just one) of many and often competing inputs and possible responses to our environment. When we operate from this space, it is common to distort a person or situation. It is the kind of primitive mentality that justifies hatred and prejudice. In its most benign forms, it is a form of fixed-mindedness that can imprison even the most rational among us. Carried to its extreme, only death of the “other” will suffice.

How do you know if you’re operating from this mentality? Fear and its usual companions, restlessness, anger, hate, or aggressiveness, are often the clue. Understanding what these emotions are telling us about ourselves, requires some intentional (and uncomfortable) tuning-in and listening to our own soundtrack.

Do you wish to master your mind, or do you wish to remain its servant? This is a choice only you can make. By becoming better aware of your own scary and negative soundtrack, you not only decrease the incidence of projection (assigning your fears and aggressions unto others), but you create space for a new choice and voice; one that will enable you to neutralize your negativity bias, and replace it with a conscious and thoughtful response instead.